Might I point you at ecalc.ch?
It's an online calculator for balancing your electrical and electronic elements - what motors, props, ESCs, batteries, frame sizes, etc., give you what flight duration, total thrust, power/weight, range and all of the other variables you're asking for.
I think a lot of us, if not all, use ecalc to come to an exact blend of what you're asking for, and then, when you've decided on what spec of ESC you're looking for, for instance, then it would be time to ask around to see who has had success and/or failure with what particular brands, models, etc.
HTH